Thursday, October 2, 2008

What I Learned From Ike

Dwight D. Eisenhower, Thirty-fourth president of the United States. Eisenhower, of course, was the original "Ike." I like this Ike, but I didn't care much for his hurricane namesake.

I've been very busy lately. On Monday (the 29th), Jennifer and I celebrated our 18th anniversary. Tuesday night, I took Audrey to an open house hosted by the Honors College at the University of Houston (her next educational stop). Last night I had to do some stuff for my secular job.

At the risk of making you very sick of reading stuff about Hurricane Ike, I thought I would share with you an interesting reflection that a parishioner of mine sent me a few days ago. If you've been through a natural disaster like Ike, you'll be able to relate to it. If not, file it away for the future, because it's just a matter of time until you have to deal with either a hurricane, a flood, a tornado, an earthquake, or something else equally devastating.

Things I Learned from Hurricane Ike

Coffee and frozen pizzas can be made on a BBQ grill.

Hot pockets taste pretty good deep fried on the outdoor cooker!

My car gets 23.21675 miles per gallon, EXACTLY (you can ask the people in line who helped me push it).

He who has the biggest generator wins.

A new method of non-lethal torture- showers without hot water.

There are a lot more stars in the sky than most people thought.

TV is an addiction and the withdrawal symptoms are painful.

A 7 lb bag of ice will chill 6-12 oz Budweiser's to a drinkable temperature in 11 minutes, and still keep a 14 lb. turkey frozen for 8 more hours.

There are a lot of dang trees around here.

Flood plain drawings on some mortgage documents were seriously wrong..

People will get into a line that has already formed without having any idea what the line is for.

Cell phones work when land lines are down [Fr. James' note: not necessarily!], but only as long as the battery remains charged.

Hampers were not made to contain such a volume.

If my store sold only ice, chainsaws, gas and generators... I'd be rich.

Waterfront property can quickly become someone else's fishing hole.

Tree service companies are underappreciated.

I learned what happens when you make fun of another states' blackout.

MATH 101: 30 days in month, minus 6 days without power equals 30% higher electric bill ?????

Drywall is a compound word, take away the 'dry' part and it's worthless.

I can walk a lot farther than I thought.

A MUST for all blackouts with kids... GLOWSTICKS! Cheap, fun, no mess!

A skateboard and a sheet make a great "sailboat" before the rain starts.

You can never have too many gas cans! If you fill the bathtubs with water, the water will not go off.

7 dogs that do not normally live together still do not get along during a hurricane...they have no comprehension of sharing.

5 gallons of sweetened iced tea a day is not enough for 9 teenagers.

Neighbors are much more sociable when they are sharing a generator.

Two-year-old canned beets taste better than you'd think. [Fr. James' note: Only if I'm starving!]

What looks acceptable by candlelight in your bathroom will scare you when you look at yourself in the mirror at the office.

Coffee is possible without Starbucks.

Rather than campfires, you find families huddled about tiny battery-operated televisions to watch The Simpsons. [Fr. James' note: Pathetic!]

Peanut butter and jelly is a perfectly acceptable meal for breakfast, lunch and dinner in the same day.

Don't shun those who use Tylenol PM or Advil PM to get through 11-hour nights.

That neighbor who knows how to use a chainsaw is your new best friend.

Ice is a form of currency.

It's OK to let the kids keep their stick fort until the debris-pickup crews start rolling in. C

oming home from work with a pizza and a charged-up laptop so the kids can watch a DVD makes you a hero.

You run out of things to barbecue after Day 2.

We don't want to hear rehashes of ball games we missed or be reminded that we may miss the season premiere of Dexter at 8 p.m. Sunday on Showtime.

Hair can dry without a blow dryer, but it may not look the way you planned.

The storm treasures your kids are finding really belong to your neighbors.

When George Noory's Coast to Coast AM returns to KTRH's late-night lineup, we sleep better.

Baseball caps go with any post-hurricane ensemble.

Grapes taste better in the dark.

You can't train yourself not to flip on light switches when entering a room.[Fr. James' note: Amen! I must have done this literally a dozen times in 36 hours!]

Lukewarm is the new cold.

You have neighbors.

It's easier to ignore a dirty floor when you can't see it.

A new opening phrase when seeing someone: "Got lights yet?"


Clint said...

I have to say that grape ALWAYS tastes good and PBJ is an acceptable meal for any occasion.

That is my story and I am sticking to it!

Molly Sabourin said...

Oh my, that is great. It must have been very cathartic for your parishioner to get that off his chest. It gives those of us who are clueless (as of yet) about the nitty gritty details of living through a natural disaster a real respect for your courage and stamina and a better appreciation for those "little things" like electricity and working phone lines that we so often take for granted.